NLP Academy Forums

The losses, gains and lessons learned of a newbie practitioner
Posted: 22 March 2011 03:20 PM   [ Ignore ]
Total Posts:  20
Joined  29-01-2010

Whenever I ask a coach or a Practitioner of NLP how they are doing I am always met with the same response: “Amazing!” or “Fantastic!”, and every time I hear it I read ” “not doing so well actually”, or “am struggling to get clients”. Nobody ever tells you about their failures or challenges with clients.

Well I thought I would do what I normally do and buck the trend. I am going to tell you about a disappointed client I had.

I was speaking to this client, who I had previously agreed to give four consultations at a knock down price in exchange for her reading my book “The Weight Loss Secret” and giving me a testimonial at the end of the process. I also gave her a money back guarantee if she didn’t lose the weight she wanted. (She was one of half a dozen clents I made this arrangement with).

Anyway, this was a couple of months back, and I met up with her last night at my Yoga class and asked her how she was. She said she was in poor health and had weighed herself and hadn’t lost any weight at all and would like at least a partial refund of her fee. Now bearing in mind I finished coaching her a month ago, and during the coaching she refused to do any of the tasks I set her, hadn’t read the book and generally blamed her inability to lose weight on her boyfriend, who kept making her big meals; I WAS TAKEN ABACK!

Every other client I have had have all had amazing results and given me glowing testimonials (all of which are unedited on my website).
“Let me get this straight”, I said, “you didn’t do the tasks I gave you, didn’t read the book until near the end of our sessions and you feel you want your money back, is that right?”. “Yes”, she said. So I refunded her money.

Lesson learned: As a coach you are not there to be liked, you are there to get results for your client. I should have refused to work with this woman the first time she failed to do the task I set her. All I succeeded in doing was reinforcing the pattern she was running.

To counter this story though, when I returned home I was browsing Facebook when a message popped in. Here is a short version of it “Just wanted to drop you a line to thank you so much for helping me to change my life. I have lost six pounds and lots of inches. I feel better inside and out….I have so much energy too”

I went to bed content. I learned some great lessons today. So if you ask me how my coaching is going….“Fantastic!”


The Weight Loss Coach

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Posted: 14 April 2011 01:53 AM   [ Ignore ]   [ # 1 ]
Total Posts:  8
Joined  16-12-2009

Thanks for sharing this, Phil.  I agree that we are here to help the client achieve the results they want (i.e. their well-formed outcomes).  However, I do not believe that the coach is responsible for getting the results on behalf of the client but rather for providing the process/framework etc. to enable them to do so. 

So, for me, the lesson is also about better contracting with the client: in order for the client to get the results they want, what are they committing to do? I, for one, will not refund a client’s money if they have not fulfilled their part of the contract!

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